The Grand Old Party is Over

By Jonathan Bert
The Extreme Moderate

March 5, 2009

The Republican Party is in shambles, only the most delusional right wingers disagree. The worst part is that the party leadership thinks the solution is to go backwards, when they are already backwards enough. They all must be stealing Rush Limbaugh’s Oxycontins!

By my very subjective observation, there are more moderate Republicans than there are moderate Democrats, but the GOP in general persecutes their moderates mercilessly. John McCain got the nomination last fall, but only after standing there testifying how Republican he was, which instantly got him labeled as Bush III. The GOP has got to realize that their ideas have totally lost respect, but they want to continue with the same old ideas, only more so.

Take me to your leader. Who the hell is it? A fellow named Michael Steele was formally chosen as the leader, but a right wing radio “Shock Jock” is the real guy! Steele and Limbaugh butted heads, and it was Steele that blinked. What hope does the party have when the leader is a fat, pill-popping loudmouth? You can walk into any honky-tonk and find dozens of drunks that talk the same way, would you pray to them for guidance?

The first thing the party has to come to grips with is that, with all respects for the dead, Reagan sucked! He was a big disaster for this country. He came up with the “Trickle Down” economic theory, which is haunting us to this day. He ended fiscal responsibility in the Republican Party. He brought the “Moral Majority” into politics, even though, when you consider their disregard for the poor, they aren’t very moral, and by the numbers, aren’t anywhere near a majority. They are, however, very loud and annoying. And sexually obsessed, loaded with self-loathing gays and other perverts. Republican “values” have been found to be bankrupt. On top of that, he spent billions on a land based missile system that was obsolete before it left the drawing board. Then, when you think about the Iran-Contra deal, Reagan and his cronies probably should have been put behind bars.

Reagan’s big talent was using splendid oratory to lead the gullible down a primrose path while doing ungodly things to our country. Sound like Obama? Yes it does! The differences are a different primrose path, (there must be several of them), and I think Obama writes some of his own material. We have give the guy some time before we can assess Obama fairly, but Reagan, we know what he did. His damage was primarily ruining our economy and fouling up our foreign affairs. He is given credit for tearing down the Berlin Wall, but the Soviet Union self-destructed. Gotta give Ronny kudos for good timing, though.

If the GOP wants to go back, go back to the nineteen-fifties, to the last great Republican President. I like Ike. Eisenhower doesn’t get nearly the respect he deserves. The Democrats at the time tried painting Ike as unintelligent, mainly because they were putting an “Egghead” up against him. We’ve had eggheads before, and since, but none of them was very impressive.

Eisenhower was excellent. He was fiscally responsible, but smart! He spent billions on a system of “Interstate and Defense Highways” (we now call them Interstates), which were designed to evacuate cities quickly and to mobilize the National Guard, but had the plus of reducing air pollution and improving intestate commerce. Sound, sensible infrastructure spending. If Ike wasn’t brilliant, I don’t know who is. He wasn’t big on social issues, but back then nobody was. Even the Democrats didn’t care much about social issues until the sixties, (remember the “Dixiecrats?”). His foreign policy? “Don’t Mess With Us!” plain and simple, and he was strong and smart about it, not trying to find ways of funneling money to his buddies. And he did this with an opposing Congress! He warned us about the “Military-Industrial Complex,” but now the GOP is in the pocket of said complex!

The Republicans have to go back to being Republicans. Maybe they need another general. Can you imagine Tommy Franks apologizing to Rush Limbaugh? David Petraeus would send a mortar shell up Rush’s ass if Limbaugh messed with him. The GOP needs a real leader, not comic relief. Let us hope for the best.

I believe in the two party system, but right now we don’t have one. Either a new party emerges, or the GOP has to resurrect itself. Get back to actually practicing fiscal responsibility. Dump your phony “Family Values” crap and clean the perverts out of your system. Care about children after they are born. Fix yourself or we may be at the mercy of the extreme left for a long time.

Barking at the Moon

By Jonathan Bert

The Extreme Moderate

December 12, 2008

The Moon is getting full again and I’m in the mood to bark.

I just moved, only seven miles, but it was still a pain in the ass. After living in the same place for 10 years, I’ve moved 3 times in the past year and a half. The way the job market is going my next move might be to a cardboard box.

America needs jobs. The Democrats are thinking like Republicans, bailing out the bigwigs instead of helping the little guys find jobs. People with jobs will pay their mortgages, pay their credit card bills, and buy new cars. These multi-billion dollar bailouts won’t do a damn thing. They want to give the car companies big loans, but they will still lay off thousands! That’s going backwards! Now the Republicans are looking good because they know a bad idea when they see one.

The Dems have a majority in the Senate, but it’s not filibuster proof. Hopefully everyone realizes what a blessing that is.

Illinois’ Governor just got busted for trying to auction off a Senate appointment! And there are other high power Democrats getting indicted. I might have to change my motto to Democrats are Crooks and Republicans are Clowns, or, let’s face it, they are all crooked clowns!

I’m trying to meet women that don’t drink, in Wisconsin. Do you know what that’s called? Lonely.

People in Wisconsin drink a lot so they can put up with the Packers.

NBC is going to move Jay Leno to 9 PM (Central Time). I need to be humored after the evening news.

Remember when people used to like Ladybugs?

A military jet crashed into a house killing two women and two children. F-18’s are fine machines, but they have no business flying over residential neighborhoods. Not in this country, anyway.

Gas prices are going down so now the SUV’s and overpowered pick-up trucks are coming out of the woodwork. I’m getting the impression Americans are slooow learners.

Winter is here in Wisconsin. Hell must be a cold place, nothing makes me feel more God-forsaken than a forty below wind chill.

New Mexico is losing a great Governor. Obama better put him to good use and not do what Bush did, ripping off Tommy Thompson then telling him to keep quiet.

I’m tired of barking. I’m gonna go out and bite somebody. Don’t worry, I’ve had my shots.